Perhaps you can imagine how wonderful
I feel being with you this morning! I bring warm greetings from Bob Pingpank,
who is at home caring for the dogs! We are admittedly too attentive to them and
will not leave them with anyone else. It's rather amazing that yesterday
morning I was in West Palm Beach and that I'll be back there tomorrow
afternoon! Also, it is a true reality check to comprehend that it was 26 years
ago that I became a part of St. Paul's, and that 12 years have passed since I
withdrew from active participation. It has been enormously satisfying to know
that you have Fr. Kilbourn's caring leadership!
As time goes by, I'm frequently
tempted to join those seniors who have become Grumpy Old Men. Health concerns
large and small visit and sometimes stay on. Three years ago right after my
60th birthday I was rushed to a nearby hospital where I was well
taken care of. It is tempting to go into detail about such matters, as everyone
seems to do when we old people gather for just about any occasion. Many years
ago I wondered why old folks talk endlessly about their illnesses. Now I know!
In fact, at times it seems as if we compete with each other regarding the
quantity and severity of our maladies. To be sure, truly dangerous afflictions
do invade our lives. Adding insult to injury, we wrestle with health
insurance providers to acquire what they have promised. Then there is the
matter of diet advisories, which offer contradictory statements. Manufacturers
of various products capitalize on the wisdom of the week! A vitamin producer
has recently offered a series of daily multivitamin pills - one especially good
for the heart, another for bones, and so on. I think I need them all!
Grumpiness is written all over the
faces of some of my fellow residents. The community in which I live is made up
of about 18 neighborhoods that total about 1,000 households. It is a
gated/guarded, beautifully land-scaped setting which accidentally has become
primarily an over-55 residential community. Throughout the day you can see men
and women walking for exercise on safe sidewalks; most of them look strident,
sour, and even angry. Our housekeeper, a wonderful woman who has become part of
the household, speaks Spanish; she has no word for sourpuss, but refers to many
of the walkers she sees as lemon-faces! She graciously accepts that she will
never have the resources to live in this or a similar community and wonders why
so many people look so dissatisfied and grouchy. Actually, many are combat
ready, too! Needless wars in Florida condominium and homeowners associations
are legendary! As a friend said recently, South Florida has such an enormous
concentration of both wealth and misery.
I still need some professional
activity, so I teach two courses just 2 days a week in a local college and help
out sporadically in some churches. In one recent class I referred to the
Gospels of Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John. One of the brightest students came to
me after class and asked what that reference meant; he had never heard of them.
Within the past month another asked whether the Jewish Passover was the
celebration of Jesus' Resurrection. I will not give essay exams, because most
are unable to write standard English, and I refuse to take on the
responsibility of being a grammar teacher, another demanding job entirely. A
good portion see themselves as consumers who at registration have purchased
credits; they assume further that they are entitled not to just a passing
grade, but an honors grade. These days there is always the possibility of a
lawsuit against a professor for not giving the desired grade or for having
phrased some comment in a supposedly insensitive way. I carry professional
liability insurance in case this, or some awful accusation, should come my way.
Churches are relatively young - as is
everything in Florida. A 25th anniversary of anything is regarded as
a momentous occasion! Most congregations seem to be preoccupied by recruiting
names for budgetary reasons under the guise of evangelism. They have actually
become public utilities providing form rather than sub- stance. Ceremonial
excess has lengthened Services so much that only the most pious and isolated
attend regularly.
Issues of health, employment, and
churchgoing, apprehensions about the future, as well as assaults from as much
bad news as television reporting will allow, seem to be factors contributing to
grumpiness among financially comfortable retirees. The entrenched problems are
not imaginary. Effective solutions remain elusive or truly impossible. The easy
slogan "If you're not part of the solution, you're part of the problem" is
unhelpful. I sometimes wonder whether my destiny at this time in my life is to
become a deeply committed, grumpy old man!
Within the past two weeks the Bishop
of Southeast Florida hosted retired clergy and their spouses, partners, and
survivors at a semi-annual luncheon. Less than two dozen people gathered for a
Service and fellowship; some others were ill at home or in nursing homes, and
several had journeyed northward for the summer. Thank goodness for the name
tags, as many of us struggled to recall names of people we seldom see. As we
gathered for the Eucharist, I heard one priest say to his wife, "I just had my
medicine, so I'd better sit near an exit." One clergymen could play the piano,
so we sang some hymns; with one of them he got so carried away that he played
an extra verse - which he vigorously sang all by himself! A short time into the
Service, the Celebrant, who will retire in September, began the Collect of the
Day, and interrupted himself with, "Oops, I'm a week behind". There was an
empathetic moment of silence while he found the right prayer. Just before we
began the Service, the bishop had asked me to lead the Prayers of the People
(Form 6), and as that time approached I glanced ahead, saw the place at which
we pray for bishops, and realized with horror that I could not recall the
Presiding Bishop's name! In these retirement years I know well my dogs' names,
but not necessarily names of bishops. Priorities and interests change. (Ah,
yes, it came to me in time: Frank!) At the time of Communion canes
assisted some, some assisted each other; one terribly bowed priest received
Communion seated in his wheelchair. I was struck by the seniority and apparent
fragility of many in this group.
After the Service we had cheese,
crackers, and fruit - which probably should have been served before the
Service. Here we kibitzed, as older people are likely to do, about the regional
non-retired clergy. Then, within minutes a delicious luncheon was served. The
table at which I sat included Bob, the bishop, another really old
clergyman and his wife, and another priest. The bishop asked Bob about some
health issues he had learned about during our crises, so last year's coronary
scare and this year's prostate biopsy - both Bob's, both with excellent
outcomes - were chronicled; the priest on my right then filled us in on his
cancer treatment. Two of us compared notes about our diabetes, blood tests,
along with my mother s December death; I never got to my feet problems and
sporadic wheelchair use. I noticed that the seemingly ancient cleric across the
table from me was saying little, and I wondered if he were still in deep grief
over a recent family death. But suddenly his wife shouted something at him, and
I realized his seeming disengagement stemmed from poor hearing, even
with his hearing aides.
I was suddenly struck by the
good-hearted laughter that flowed with the humor interjected between our
medical stories and the bursts of laughter coming from other tables as well. I
suspect that each of us had a valid list of burdens that had come our way. Each
there had cause to become chronically grumpy. Yet, unlike those lemon-faced
neighbors eager to whine and to wage war over the color of lawns, size of pools
and shrubbery, and the shape of mailboxes; unlike those who focus exclusively
and negatively on their circumstances, the seniors gathered for the Bishop's
luncheon were fundamentally upbeat, accommodating gracefully their burdens and
sorrows. Why?
Recall those familiar words of Jesus:
"Come unto me all ye that are travail and are heavy laden, and I will refresh
you." I don't pretend to know how it happens, but when people gather to share
the blessed Bread, refreshment can occur among willing recipients. A rest and
ease from weariness, from sorrow, needless guilt, and even religious
pretentiousness, can rescue us from despair. We experience the Spirit to cope
with adversity. A sense of peaceful security and a quieting of life's
inevitable storms flow into our hearts and minds. This is not a magic that
controls us; we must be open to God's rejuvenating power. And, all this occurs
around shared Bread - the ancient symbol of nourishment, social bonding,
hospitality, respect, and concern; the primary Christian symbol of the
life-giving power of God, the Way lived and taught by the Risen Christ.
I'm not denying that similar effects
can come from other settings: psychotherapy, A.A., precious moments anywhere
with beloved people. How can anyone limit the workings of the Spirit of love?
But in this very place, sacred over the years to hundreds of witnesses to these
things you and I are provided this morning with extraordinary, commemorating
Bread that refreshes. In an email I received last week from a clergyman friend,
he told of his 3-week visit to the Holy Land from which he had just returned;
he commented: In light of what happened in Jerusalem two thousand years ago, we
have no reason to do anything but break the Bread and shout Alleluia!
My friends, you and I cannot choose
everything that happens to us, and we cannot remedy all the world's problems,
but we can choose to a large extent how we respond: as grumpy
individuals or as an Easter fellowship - scarred, coping, and refreshed
together to carry on.
And, now a post script. A week from
tomorrow we set out with the dogs on our annual 3-week pilgrimage to
northeastern Georgia, a beautiful area reminiscent of Litchfield County.
However, in May of 2001 we hope to take an entire month and return to New
England. All four of us hope to see you then!